A Plea to Buzzard Beach
By Ike Hill

All right, so someone got a great deal on a five-gallon bucket of gray paint. I'm happy that this purchase of pigment made your day. It is even more impressive that it was used to redo the men's pisser. You put a new toilet seat on, which is great, and even cleaned the floors. Wow! And a clean slate for the walls was truly a stroke of genius. It was about damn time new visitors and past regulars were allowed to add new graffiti to the classic location of ideas and humor. I loved the fact that the past had been wiped away. New and old information, thoughts and stupid drunken quotes were allowed to be easily added and read by all.

In fact it was in no time at all that one of my favorite all time classics was reposted:
"I FUCKED your mom" followed by, "Go home Dad. You're DRUNK!"

Yes, it was a new day. A fresh gray tapestry of entertainment was at hand, but not for long.

NO! Shortly after several trips to the new and improved reading room, it was all simply gone…AGAIN! Gray. . . . gray as far as the walls stretch in that tiny cramped refuge of stank.

What is wrong with you people? You're a five-star dive bar, and that title comes with a half-star crapper! Don't try to fool us, and don't try to kid yourselves. Give us back our literature. PLEASE!

For our readers out there with comments, please send an e-mail to:
PleaToBuzzardBeach@KCDrinker.com.

We will collect all of them and deliver them to the appropriate authorities.

Bring your pens and markers,
Ike

- www.KCDrinker.com - 2005 ©

Eisenhower ‘Ike’ Hill is a high altitude native of Colorado Springs, CO. After extensive blackouts, he now runs guns to fuel the Missouri Border Wars near Kansas City, MO.  He is fully credited for the theory of, "Complete a sentence, and take a shot of whiskey." In his spare time, which is a lot, he enjoys dressing as an (Irish) Catholic priest and hearing the confessions of hot chicks.